China
Zhongguo-this is how you say ‘China’ in Chinese. This Asian country is home to some of the World’s greatest landmarks and innovative people around the world.
The longest flight I’ve ever been on was from Detroit to Beijing. It was like an eternal road trip because of the time difference between the US and China (a whopping 13 hours based on Daylight Savings). I was traveling for two days and opted to go this route since I was working with the budget I set for myself. So a shower, changing into clean clothes, and getting into bed would be my first order of business. In short, I was a walking zombie of lethargy and curiosity, not to mention already feeling pangs of homesickness.
Fast forward to being at an apartment and scouring every surface in sight before I could feel even a semblance of comfort-the only time I stopped was to reassure my family I made it safe and sound; then it was time to explore my new environs.
On the street, I stood out like The Hulk at a tea party; I was as alien to them as they were to me. The stares were the strangest I’ve ever felt when looking into the eyes of strangers. However, these looks were not of disdain-mere curiosity is what it was. I have come to understand that I was in a small town where many Chinese had yet to see a foreigner – much less an ebony one.
It also didn’t help that my hair was so intricately different from what citizens considered normal. Many were in awe of having such a foreigner in their midst; it truly felt like I was not from another country- but another planet altogether.
From the very old to the very young (eager mothers nudging their children to say hello and speak in English to the foreigner), this was quite amusing as most children were always shy and cowered away from the opportunity.
Whenever I went out those first couple months, I would always expect to be stopped and asked to “take a photo.” The bold ones, however, were not afraid to speak and ask for my Weixin (WeChat-social media app similar to Whatsapp). How could I refuse to take a picture, especially with children?
Honestly, I’ve lost track of how many images persons captured with and without my permission. After a while, I politely declined and hoped those who asked understood why I did so.
BEWILDERMENT
Many things baffled me, and the primary one was how my first visit to the hospital was not private and that I needed to visit the hospital for minor reasons. Back home, whenever I was ill, I would see my family doctor or any doctor who has a practice in a building they own or lease. You register, wait for your name to be called, enter the doctor’s office, close the door and discuss your reason for visiting.
Now, in China, the doctors all work at the hospital. I haven’t met a doctor with their own private practice; I don’t know if they exist here. The only time anyone goes to the hospital back home is if they are in critical condition, that’s how you know how serious their situation is.
“Hey Sara, how’s your mom? I heard she went to the doctor.”
“Hi June, she’s ok-thanks for asking. The doctor prescribed some medicine, and she’s right as rain now.”
“That’s good to know.”
*********************
“Hey Sara, how’s your mom? I remember you took her to the doctor.”
“Hello June, she’s at the hospital.”
“What? Oh my God, is she alright? I didn’t know it was so serious. How are you holding up?”
“The doctors are caring for her. I’m going to see her during visiting hours. Thanks for asking, June.”
In these two scenarios, Sara is concerned about June’s mother. However, upon hearing she went to the doctor, she was not too alarmed. Hearing June’s mom was in the hospital was more of a shocking concern to her.
Whenever I mentioned going to the hospital, my folks became quite alarmed and worried because, in our culture-something must be devastatingly wrong for that to happen. They were probably thinking of MRI and CAT scans during those times. It seems rather dramatic, but that’s the whole point, you know? It took a while to adjust, but they eventually understood not to be alarmed unless told otherwise.
When I went to see the doctor in the hospital, there was a dreadfully long line commencing inside her office and ending in the hall outside it. People were telling the doctor what was wrong, and others could hear every word. Suffice to say, this was one of those times the language barrier didn’t bother me. I could speak and not worry about someone overhearing and understanding what I was saying to the doc. But, as I said, the line was in the office, and I did not want to be considered rude if I had asked to close the door when this was the norm, which takes us to my next point.
ENTITLEMENT
How dare you? How dare you?
Everywhere I looked, I saw Simplified Chinese; not one store or street corner had an English name. At the time, my mind thought, why don’t they have more English words on the buildings? I can’t tell which store is which just from the name. (eye-roll) Honestly, what was I really thinking? That the place I decided to be in should change for me?! Ridiculous! What right did I have, to feel and think this way? No right whatsoever! No one forced me, it was intentional, and I must learn to live where I made the decision to be in the first place.
It is simply too arrogant of you to think just because you’re in a new place you know nothing about―that it should change to suit your needs.
I was ashamed of myself. How dare I think this way? I found it appalling; I wasn’t aware I was capable of feeling such entitlement in this way. But, understandably, if I didn’t have this experience, there would be no way I could learn to be more open-minded.
The minute I realized this was the moment things became less stressful. I chose what bothered me and what wasn’t deserving of my time of day. Remember, when you go to a new place-be fair in what you ask of it and, by extension, what you ask of yourself.
PEOPLE of China
Even though you’re considered an alien in someone’s country, you don’t have to feel alienated. Fortunately, I had my Orshiboo with me. While friends and family are only a phone call away-I still miss everyone. This is where good people come in. I don’t remember having such a good relationship with my dentist, nurses, or even a chiropractor as I do here.
All the people I’ve met in the health sector are some of the kindest and most accommodating I’ve ever encountered. Then there are the people I’ve met either on my own or through a mutual friend, and everyone likes to go out and eat.
Yet again, most have been generous and super helpful. I’ll never forget my pregnant friend, who brought Orshiboo and me to the hospital for our checkup. Not to mention another Chinese friend who realized how homesick I get during Christmas and insisted I come to her house to barbecue in her backyard. It’s either this or visiting dinner halls to hang out, and dining halls are always full at lunch and dinner times as the Chinese love eating together. At times this is where I’ll be with friends, eating around a circular table. This shape is favorable in China. Should you watch the Trip to Beijing video, you’ll know why this is.
FOOD
There’s a conversation I remember having with my best friend.
Me: “Did you eat?”
Him: “Yeah, I had some Chinese food. Though I suppose for you, it’s just food, right?”
Lol. Yeah, for me it’s just food. Here’s the thing though, what I knew to be Chinese food is anything but. When I asked my Chinese friend where I could have some Beef Lo Mein, General Tso’s Chicken, or Chicken Chow Mein, she looked at me as if I’d sprouted a second head.
“What’s that?”
“What do you mean?” was my response, for I wondered how she could not recognize the food I had just asked about. Her response is completely normal; all the above are Western Chinese food. I’m not saying you can’t find Western Chinese food in China-you could probably find it in cities like Beijing or Shanghai, where there is more of an influx of foreigners.
My point is, the Chinese food we know in the West is not at all considered authentic Chinese food here. When discussing this with a Chinese friend, she understood what I meant since she took a trip to South Korea, and to her amazement, Korean food in China is different from Korean food in Korea. Everyone puts their own spin on things because they know what their fellow countrymen and women will like and dislike.
I’ve barely scratched the surface of first impressions in China; this article is longer than initially intended. Should you have any questions because you’re planning on making the trip or just for general knowledge, leave a comment below.
Read More about My Journey: Famous Historical Landmarks in Beijing
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August 28, 2022
